For me, weekends thrill and terrify. A weekend's got so many possibilities at 8am on a Friday, but the moments dissipate. And then it's Monday, and it's back to reality. Nearly every Friday, I tell myself that this weekend I will write for pleasure, continue working on my business plan, do the grocery shopping, clean the house and car, bake some bread, figure out how to get people to read my blog -- part of that involves writing in my blog, make a lemon tart, walk the dogs, yoga, take dance class, get a massage and do nothing.
On Sunday night, the panic sets in that I've only tackled a portion of the list, haven't done anything creative and now it's time to put everything off again until next weekend.
It's time for me to make a change.
I've felt creatively blocked for some time. I've been telling myself that it's okay, that I just need to do other things until it works itself out, but it's 12:30p on a Sunday, I've sat down to write, and I can only focus on the million other things that I have to do before I wake up and I'm tracking every 1/4 hour and multi-tasking like my life depends on it.
Good Magazine's latest issue focuses on decompressing. They ask a question that I'd like to figure out for myself: "We are taught that we'll be judged by what we achieve, but what does it mean to actually achieve?"
I'll be noodling on this question until I figure out what it means for me. I suspect that if I can answer this question for myself, the rest will fall into place and suddenly, I'll be on the road to doing what I need to to feel content, successful and happy with what I am achieving in life.
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